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2003.08.17 : 2003.08.23

Saturday, August 23, 2003
Blab. It is said that true genius is never appreciated in its lifetime, and we're well on our way to such appellations after staying up until 1 AM to post Plurp last night.

We have found a wonderful hotel in London. Unlike everyplace else we have ever stayed, it has air conditioning, is on a quiet street, has an elevator that doesn't remind us of the Tower of Terror, is on a quiet street, and has really, really nice interior design.
And was it on a really quiet street?
Yes. And it was air conditioned as well. After several sleepless nights in a hotel that featured neither, we thought they were worth emphasizing.

Blab. We've been telling you that computers are taking over the world. When will you believe us?
First the Terminator running for office, now Asimo schmoozing with world leaders. Why won't somebody do something about the robot menace!?
Asimo, in particular, worries us.
"Let's drink to Japan and the Czech Republic, and to the friendly relationship between humans and robots," Asimo, made by Honda, said in perfect Czech.
As long as we cooperate, eh?

Blab. A zombophiliac writes:
Actually, the new reference to the "simulation" did include a mod for killing zombies. Check it out again....
- Felis Lynx
Quite so. You can't adjust the proclivity of the humans to try to kill the zombies, or their probability of success, but they do indeed slaughter the diseased, raving undead. Sometimes. But the zombies take over in the end anyway.
Just like real life.

Plop. The Times (London) reports:
Computer software companies have been accused of failing to stamp out viruses because they make so much money selling programmes to combat them.
The traditional media have been accused of failing to think very hard about the stories they report because they make so much money selling mindless hype.

Yow. So here's what you do. You go to Harrod's and buy:

A lovely, fresh baguette

A sharp cheddar

Duck paté with mushrooms

Thin strips of smoked goose

Very yellow English butter

Middle Eastern spring roll thingies with phyllo dough and chicken and lemon and mysterious herbs

A Middle Eastern salad with lentils, kidney beans, garbanzo beans, grains, garlic, walnuts, oil and vinegar

A clementine

An extremely juicy pear

Florentine cookies with white chocolate

An altogether silly little cake with yellow marzipan frosting, surmounted by a tiny teddy bear that is holding a red heart, and on which is written Happy Birthday in red icing, and

Chilled vintage champagne, with little plastic glasses that materialize out of nowhere when you ask.

Then you take all of that and go to St. James' Park and sit on the grass, near the pond with the ducks and geese, and have yourself a picnic.
Or not. Hey, up to you.

Plurp.
The blue dog
turned out to be a
mechanical zombie
on a really quiet street

Friday, August 22, 2003
Blab. Getting all in the mood of our reader-initiated Obscure Reader Plurp Contest, several reader write thusly.
Do you have a spell-chekcer? Even a spell-chekcer would help.
Goood one!
Do you have a helen naked piture? Even a helen naked piture would help.
A classic, to be sure. What more can we say?
Do you have a more exciting contest than this one? Even a slightly more interesting contest will do.
Rude. Just plain rude. Stop that.

Blab. Proving that the zombies are, indeed, spreading is this reader.
Computer simulation of the epidemiology of urban zombification
Looks like the same zombies infecting a different site. You're next. You're next! (Oh yeah - wrong movie.) In that same vein, a demanding reader suggests:
The zombie "simulation" needs to be updated to equip random humans with shotguns....
- Felis Lynx
And you'll get right on that? Thanks very.

Blab. A reader who likely does not live in the U.S. northeast writes:
|\_._._/|
| o o |
\ .` /
|`---|
|    |    Der blaue Hund watched the randomly
|`___|\_    numbed generators switch off.
/|     |\
##     ##
(man, was that a stinker.)
We are delighted to agree with you, Treasured Reader.

Blab. A reader suggests that ...
You can laugh at it, but not just before bedtime...
Which is pretty funny, unless you drive an ice-cream truck or live in Thailand.
An ice-cream truck driver in Thailand died while laughing in his sleep, a newspaper reported Thursday.
Damnoen Saen-um, 52, laughed for about two minutes on Wednesday and then stopped breathing, The Nation said, quoting officials.
Have a nightcap; sleep tight.

Blab. Our new best bud Michael Merkin writes to us once again.
Thanks for posting my photo and my website, stopabductions.com
You may be interested in my new website, aliensandchildren.org
The site is real and the information is real.
Email me at mmenkin@hotmail.com if you have any questions.
Thanks again,
Michael Menkin
All sorts of questions occur to us, but we'll keep them to ourselves for now. We fear the aliens may be watching.

Blab. That very Treasured Reader who minted the term autohelenism once again graces our pixels.
"We wonder, however, is the Catholic bear thing is an authentic autohelenism, or a sly and knowing mix-up."
I thought of that myself, but decided that it didn't matter. a) Nothing on your Helenism page suggests that the mix-up must be accidental. b) I've heard "half of one, six dozen of the other" many times myself, and I think it's always been done intentionally.
Yes, unintentionalism is a relatively recent and certainly controversial school within the system of belief that is Helenism. Nonetheless, we are a believer. Unintentional Helenisms are marvels of cognition. It's just not the same when they are crafted by hand.
Oh, and half of one, six dozen of the other may have been said intentionally by others, but it was said quite unintentionally, and quite marvelously, by Helen herself. We checked.

Blab. A reader seeks professional help. This seems wise.
Being one of the more (I)ANAL people I look for professional help. Groklaw is my guide. If you can spell SCO then you'll find this a most informative, amusing, and, heaven forfend, helpful site. I can't wait for the public cruxification of Darl McBride. The punishment should fit the crime and he certainly has a religious zeal about him.
Dorian, the helpless
That's a dandy article you reference! It seems that the Linux code that SCO recently displayed in public as allegedly having come from SCO didn't have anything at all to do with IBM, the only company against which they have currently brought suit. Aren't these guys fun?
Anyhow, we don't think Darl will get a public crucifixion. He won't be worth the expense when this is all over.

Blab. A reader obsesses on this week's random, disconnected topic.
counting crows rule *dances*
Kay, d00d.

Blab. A reader engages in conversation with some other reader. We feel downright rude for listening in, but we can't resist.
To your other reader - Sarah Gordon is actually a very lovely lady and not at all loopy. Having a different opinion is not a loopy thing, but the sign of being a bright and unique individual. -AJL
So there you are.

Blab. That chemically-oriented reader who wants restaurant recommendations in Manhattan is back with more specifics.
"If you would be kind enough to let us know what kind of food you like, or what price range might suit you,"
I'm not a picky eater--I like almost anything. I do tend to be rather adventurous in trying new foods, so if there's anything especially unusual I'd be interested to hear about it. I'm a bit of a chile-head, so very spicy foods are good, but that's by no means a requirement.
As far as price range, I'd like to keep it under $50 for everything (so with tax, tip, drink, and maybe desert I'm guessing that comes to an upper limit of $30, maybe $35 for the entree alone). But don't feel like you have to go that high--if you have an inexpensive restaurant that you like I'd love to hear about that too.
That's a tough one! For $50, we would probably direct you to Lutèce, and suggest that you order a glass of water.
But, OK, there are restaurants in NYC that are both pretty good and not expensive. (By "not expensive", we mean "under $100 per person".)
Really good pierogi (by our way of thinking, but note that we are not Polish) can be had at Veselka in the East Village: 144 Second Ave. at 9th St.
If you like hot, we like Dâwat (though it's not cheap): 58th St. between 2nd Ave. and 3rd Ave. Go ahead: order the vindaloo and ask them to make it like they do back home.
Chinatown is full of really good, fairly cheap places. Quite a number of restaurants have Peking duck just hanging around, so to speak, so that you don't have to order it a day ahead like you do in the hinterlands. Check the menu before you go in.
Good sushi? Hatsuhana on 48th St. between 5th Ave. and Madison Ave. But forget about that $50 thing.
Oh. Another thing. You can often get good deals at really good restaurants by going there for lunch instead of dinner. Compare, for instance, lunch at Lutèce to dinner at Lutèce. But be sure to make reservations. Now.

Blab. A reader censors itself. We appreciate that.
Excuses are like opinions; it's all about a**holes.
We appreciate your opinion.

Plurp. Before returning to London today, we took a few minutes to visit the magnificent Winchester cathedral, which formed the view from our hotel window while we were there on conference.
We were particularly struck by the number of memorials to those who lost their lives "in service of their country" in places and circumstances described as:

The siege of Delhi

Mboyani in East Africa

British Central Africa

Egypt

Somaliland

The Niger Territories

Illah & Siami

The campaign in Afghanistan

Umballa, India, and

Niancaru Congo States.

It struck us as incongruous that a church, which celebrates peace, would praise those who carried out State campaigns of murder and imperialism across several continents. But that's probably a very recent sensitivity. After all, the English did the same thing in Wales and Scotland and Northern Ireland. The Romans did the same thing in England. The U.S. did the same thing against the various Indian nations in North America, as well as against the Spanish out West.. It was the way in which nations grew, arguably until very recently.
Recently, this kind of thing has been frowned upon, and there has been a general attempt to retain whatever borders countries had after (approximately) World War I. With notable exceptions, of course.
We wonder how this will turn out in the long run. Especially if people continue to praise those who kill for the State.

Yow. We have found a wonderful hotel in London. Unlike everyplace else we have ever stayed, it has air conditioning, is on a quiet street, has an elevator that doesn't remind us of the Tower of Terror, is on a quiet street, and has really, really nice interior design.
As usual, we're not telling you where it is. You'd only drive the price up.

Yow. We went to see Edward II at the restored Globe theater tonight. Nice theater. Long play.

Yow. Here's something astonishing.
The Tampa Police Department in Florida this week [said that their controversial facial-recognition system] had not helped them catch even one criminal.
The system, which scanned faces in a crowd and compared them to photographs of criminals in a database, had come under fire by privacy and civil liberties advocates since its installation two years ago. Critics feared the system would make false identifications or invade people's privacy.
Capt. Bob Guidara, a spokesman for the Tampa Police Department, said [...], "We never identified, were alerted to, or caught any criminal," he said. "It didn't work."
That's not the astonishing thing. The astonishing thing is that the City Fathers took decommissioned the system. Of course, they did it because it didn't work, rather than because it invaded everyone's privacy.
But, still.

Yow. Christian orgies? It's enough to make us religious. (Caution: Naked people and words.) (Dave)

Plurp.
The blue dog
found a great restaurant in Manhattan
with dinner for under $50.

Thursday, August 21, 2003
Blab. A minty fresh reader writes:
I'd like to coin the term "Autohelenism" for Helenisms in which the two component phrases are one and the same. The only autohelenism currently on your list is "half of one, six dozen of the other."
Submitted for your approval, another autohelenism:
"Is a bear Catholic? Does the Pope sh*t in the woods?"
We like the term! We wonder, however, is the Catholic bear thing is an authentic autohelenism, or a sly and knowing mix-up. (We have been using this phrase for years, quite intentionally.)

Blab. A reader who has never been to New York writes:
I will be in New York a few weeks hence for a conference.   Could you recommend a few good Midtown restaurants?
That's a bit like asking, I will be in Rome a few weeks hence; could you recommend a few good churches?
Seriously! You can find any kind of food you can imagine in Midtown, usually with any kind of atmosphere you want, and there is no upper limit on price ranges.
If you would be kind enough to let us know what kind of food you like, or what price range might suit you, we would be happy to make some recommendations.

Blab. A famous reader squeaks by our censors only because they know very little about baking.
"Stick a clam up your cakehole!" -- "Shut your cakehole" + "clam up" = Helenism? -PEF
Wild! Where does that Stick part come from? Maybe it's:

Stick it up your cakehole

Clam up

... which sort of mean something similar, though that first phrase only gets two Google hits.
What do you think?

Blab. An omnihomeopathist writes:
Since at one point or another, all substances on earth have been in contact with some water, which itself has been in contact with all the other water on earth, directly or indirectly, doesn't that make all water homeopathically active for every possible thing that homeopathy claims to work for?
Heavens no! Imagine all those vibrations mixed together. Imagine how confusing that must be for the poor human body. Why, pretty much anything could happen if you drink such confusing water. Please make sure you drink only water prepared by a certified homeopath, and eat only food prepared in such water.
Otherwise, we cannot be held responsible for the consequences. (Of course, we can't anyway, but whatever.)

Blab. A reader writes:
No, seriously, is Sarah Gordon as loopy as she seems?
Goodness. There's a page that needs some serious updating.

Blab. A reader opens a tattered black leather case, takes out a banjo, sits on one of the tall wooden stools and sings:
I want to work, with you, for the Big Blue...
Thank you. Please form a line. Take a number. No running.

Blab. On the recent salt obsession around these parts, a reader writes:
Matthew 5:13 Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men.
See? This simply confuses us. Salt is salt. It's a very simple compound. It can no more "lose its savour" than water can avoid being a liquid (at STP). So it's either lousy chemistry or lousy metaphor. Or both.

Blab. A reader decides that we haven't heard of Google.
Counting Crows: Angels of the Silence
(misc. lyrics)
I dream of Michelangelo when I'm lying in my bed
Little angels hang above my head and read me like an open book
Suck my blood   break my nerve   offer me their arms
Well, I will not be an enemy of anything
I'll only stand here
(misc. lyrics)
Quite. But this does not address the fundamental question: Why were people searching Plurp for i dream of michaelangelo when we had never before used that phrase?
It's a Mystery of the Seas.

Blab. Today, we received the following cry for help.
Subj: SAVE MY FAMILY
Dear sir,
I know that this letter will come to you as a surprise due to the fact that we have not yet met each other before, but please I will like you to consider my present family troubles and be rest assured that there is no cause for alarm. Please put yourself in my position and help me the way you will expect people to assist you to redeem your family's wealth.I am Mr. David Savimbi, son of the late rebel leader Jonas Savimbi of Angola who was killed on the 22nd of February 2002. Presently, I am desperately looking for a trustworthy person to assist me in this confidential business.
My late father, Jonas Savimbi lodged huge sums of money realized from
And that's all there was! We infer that Mr. David Savimbi was killed in the middle of typing this desperate plea, and that his nose hit the Send button as his lifeless face hit the keyboard.
Tragic. Just tragic.

Blab. A reader sends us a blind ...
[link].
But, this time, it was because the Mind Control Lasers forced him to do so! That's because we wanted to show you the impact on the Internet of the recent blackout in the northeast U.S.
Very cool! (Go look.)

Yow. Zombies! (Dave)

Plop. We snore while we sleep. This seems likely to be disturbing to those with whom we sleep. Is this next for us?

Plurp.
The blue dog
was desperately looking for a trustworthy person to assist in this confidential business.

Wednesday, August 20, 2003
Blab. The entries are pouring in (well, trickling, truth be told) for our reader-initiated Obscure Reader Plurp Contest, whose purpose is still anybody's guess. The first entry seems a safe bet in any case.
Do you have an Obscure Reader Plurp Contest? Even an Obscure Reader Plurp Contest would help.
More risky, but still funny due to its topicality, is this.
Do you have plausible deniability? Even plausible deniability would help.
The gnomes kindly generate an entry unit to what seems to be an entirely different contest.
Everything is a unit, a stimulator, a unit stimulator and/or a stimulator unit. See, check it out:
Do you have any units? Any unit will do.
Do you have any stimulators? Any stimulator will do.
Do you have any unit stimulators? Any unit stimulator will do.
Do you have any stimulator units? Any stimulator unit will do.

I hope this simplifies everything for all of you.
Sincerely,
The generous gnomes of the near present.
Perhaps their simulator unit was broken. And finally (for today, anyhow):
my entry for the obscure contest:
Do you have a seeing-eye-dog
Even a seeing-eye-dog would help
geewits
Why yes, we do, but all of them seem to be noseless.
As usual, some of our readers seem unable to enter the contest, trapped as they are in the metadata.
I think the competition is about getting rosetta stone into the top ten search requests. Do I win? If so what? If not why not? Far too many ifs. If indeed that is how you spell ifs.
Other readers (or maybe these same readers - we can't tell) are encouraged to enter whatever contest this is!

Blab. A spammist initially seems to have targeted us correctly.
Subj: The Scientific Explanation Of Homeopathy
But it turns out to be about that normal old homeopathy stuff. And for us, a little homeopathy goes a long way.

Blab. A reader introduces us to an amazing thingie.
Spellign Errosr
"brittnery spears"? People scare us.

Blab. A reader asks a random question.
Um, who is Dark Avenger?
The virus, the virus author, or the swashbuckling hero?

Blab. A reader contributes an obscene version of ...
this,
which we played successfully for many hours during our conference today.

Blab. A reader explains that ...

Dr. Yu Explains It All

... which may well be true. Now if we only knew what it was.
We also want to know what that strange mechanical device in the background is.

Blab. A reader who cares about our metabolic state checks in with us.
Are you enjoying London? It's not as hot as a couple of weeks ago, so I'm guessing you're OK without the AC...
London was still hot enough to force us to choose between (not) sleeping with the window open on a noisy street or (not) sleeping in a sweaty room. Winchester, where we are right now, is noticeably cooler and quieter. And the view of the cathedral from the window of our hotel room is really quite stunning.
We're back in London on Friday for a couple more days, then back to the Continent That Has Heard of Ice and Air Conditioning.

Blab. A reader offers us a frightening possibility.
Automatically translate phrases into the Universal Language of Cats
We'll have to take your word for this, as trying any of the standard phrases causes our browser to crash. We do, however, particularly like this useful addition.
Advances in Schrödinger equation technology now enable the quantum scattering of Rufo's meows in relationship to various barriers and wells.
Handy!

Blab. A reader makes a confusing claim.
Steve, you're the salt of the earth!
We never understood that phrase. Is it as opposed to, say, the iron oxide of Mars, or the ammonia of Jupiter? If so, we suppose we should be flattered. Or should we?

Plurp. Imagine a horde of lost, yearning Web surfers. Imagine them landing, somehow, here. Imagine their confusion.
Now imagine what they do next. They search for these.

i dream of michaelangelo

helen naked pitures

iris chacon

imani

britney

chihuly

arsenic poisoning pictures

naked female dogs

quorn naked pictures

angelina jolie

We have no idea why that first one was popular. It's the first mention of it on our humble Web site.
We are pleased, however, that our readers know how to spell britney.

Yo. BFR.

Yak. Not from our conference this week, but too good not to post.
It's that long-term, 2001: A Space Odyssey view.

Rant. We hate computers. Readers will recall how, yesterday, Ian became People's Hero at our conference in the Zone of Unpredictable Connectivity by bringing our computer back from the dead and getting wireless working on it. What a d00d.
Now, today, we have wireless access to the IBM intranet, but not to the Internet. Ian, sitting right beside us, can get to the external Web, but can't send external email. David, sitting in front of us, has no trouble with any of these.
The computers are only doing this to make us angry.
And it's working.

Plurp.
britneyt spears
brittan spears
brittne spears
btittany spears
beitney spears
birteny spears
brightney spears
brintiny spears
britanty spears
britenny spears

Tuesday, August 19, 2003
Blab. A reader clears up one of the most long-standing mysteries of Plurp.
We are reminded (by virtue of it being stuck to the wall next to our desk) of the dilbert cartoon. Dilbert is on a tour of accounting:

Tour Guide : "Over here we have our random number generator"

RNG : "Nine, Nine, Nine, Nine, Nine, Nine"

Dilbert : "Are you sure that's random?"

Tour Guide : "That's the problem with randomness, you can never be sure."

:-)
-AJL
Astonishing! We are now given to believe that Helen is random. We feel so completely enlightened.

Blab. A reader complains about that guilty Glue State.
Started in Ohio, eh? Perhaps we should swap Ohio with Canada. It's all waste space in either case but the prices are better in Canada. I did hear that Canada put BOTH of its soldiers on alert fearing an attack from the U.S. but they "pulled the plug" on mobilizing them once they realized that the snowplow was in the shop for an oil change. Perhaps that's what happened. Damn serious plug, eh?
from the attic, where it is always dark, I remain...
Dorian, the mushroom.
Let's try to put a positive spin on this, shall we? Ohio is there to perform the invaluable service of preventing "Canada" from sliding down into Kentucky and West Virginia. And that's important. Maybe not important enough to forgive them for having blacked out the entire northeast of the U.S., but important.
What astounds us is that anything that could happen in Ohio could have caused a cascading failure that large. Who designed this dopey system, anyhow?

Blab. An aromatic reader writes:
It's been very hot without power for the air conditioner.
I now TASTE like salt. Can perdition be far away?
Man, you've really lost me on the whole salt thing.
How do you find such intellectual corners?
Dorian, the salty dog.
You didn't follow that salt thing? It's a metaphor for ... uh ...

Blab. A reader yanks our chain reaction.
Subj: plurp's contribution
It appears that the northeast power company, Niagra-Mohawk, is owned by an English firm and has no generating capacity. Perhaps you could pop over to the local pub, find the chaps who own it, and ask them to use a better grade of extension cord for their long-line transmissions?
Damn useful that plurp is now in England. Plus we get postings as a reasonable hour :-)
Dorian, the yank
Niagra-Mohawk or Niagara-Mohawk? We can't tell. We asked the folks in the local pub about both. They looked at us as if we were from a foreign country. So, you know, we don't know.

Blab. A reader strides up to the podium, taps on the mike three times, clears its throat, and says ...
I'd like to announce an Obscure Reader Plurp Contest. As with the previous Obscure Reader Plurp Contest, part of the contest is figuring out what the contest is.
Here are three entries:
Do you have an orbital mind control laser? Even an orbital mind control laser would help.
Do you have a rosetta stone? Even a rosetta stone would help.
Do you have a necronomicon? Even a necronomicon would help.
Hmm. We understand two out of three of those entries. But we're hopelessly confused about the middle one. But never mind! Our readers are not only more obscure than we are - they are also more clever. So all you folks should enter whatever contest this is. We're sure not going to win.

Blab. A reader establishes this fact.
I'm too stupid to for this blog.
As are well all, Treasured Reader, as are we all.

Blab. A reader reveals its Xmas list. Too early, as it turns out.
I want to see the mother of all blabs!
Mom's not here right now. Can we take a message?

Blab. A reader stumbles across a ...
Badass seed.
If this is to be believed, it is as follows.
The Royal Botanic Gardens in Edinburgh has succeeded where many of its counterparts around the world failed by germinating the world's largest seed.
The coco de mer (Lodicea maldivica), which is shaped like a woman's pelvis, is from a palm tree found only in the Seychelles. It weighs 16kg (35lb).
And no, we are not going to post a picture for you. Naughty boy!

Blab. Another implausible reader writes:
Plausible deniability? What do you know about plausible deniability?! I am plausible deniability!
We plausibly deny that we have ever previously mentioned plausible deniability.

Yow. Here's where we make two important but utterly banal observations.

Computers suck.

Ian rules.

Specifically, our wireless connectivity was completely hosed before we came here to the Zone of Unpredictable Connectivity, said wireless whatsit having degraded slowly and painfully over many months previous. In an attempt to get it working this morning, we stirred the bits; we tried uninstalling and then reinstalling it.
Never stir the bits. We tempted fate already by doing a massive volume of Windows Updates just before we left home, but that was excusable (sort of) as a necessary protection against all of the nastyware that exploits the many gaping holes in Windows.
Stunningly, our machine still worked after we did.
Spun up into such overconfidence, we stirred the bits once again this morning. Once too often, it seems, as some hindbrain of Windows complained about a missing user interface DLL and refused to boot at all.
This always happens to us. It's why we never stir the bits. Computers suck.
This is where Ian snatches our moribund machine out of our hands and, with fingers flying at lightspeed, through several reboots and what appear to be bloody purges of the stray contents of the registry, (a) gets Windows working again, (b) gets wireless working again and (c) gets wireless working better than it did before.
Ian rules.

Plop. According to journalistic paragon Fox News,
[Government sources] are unable to rule out the possibility that a computer hacker plunged 50 million people into darkness.
Given how early it is in the investigation, they are probably equally unable to rule out space aliens. But maybe that's territory for the Weekly World News.

Yak. The guy behind us, answering his cell phone at our conference in the Zone of Unpredictable Connectivity.
Hello?
...
What?
...
No, I can't talk. I'm at a conference.
...
At a conference.
What an oxymoron.

Yak. And again ...
This talk is about pain. Up until this point, it was about my pain, as I labored through the night to create dozens of complex and incomprehensible PowerPoint charts. Now it is about your pain, as I force you to gaze in horror at each of these charts in turn.

Plurp.
The blue dog
discovered a large fig
shaped like a dog with no nose

Monday, August 18, 2003
Blab. A reader sends us a blind(ing) ...
[link].
To which we can only say: (Mary J.) Bilge.

Blab. A reader shakes a bit of salt into the wound that is Plurp.
"Conservatism enables true salt to remain in the shaker while it attempts pragmatic deal making with an enemy bent on destroying God's children."
Google leads us here.
Conservatism looks like salt, talks like salt, acts like salt, seeks the vote and friendship of salt, yet, when the test of taste comes, it is revealed for what it really is - a tasteless enabler of perdition!
Hey. We didn't say we understood it.

Blab. Mistaking us for an alphabet, a reader writes:
Do you have a pee? Even a pee would help.
Do you have a pee? Even a pee would help.
Do you have a pee? Even a pee would help.
Do you have a pee? Even a pee would help.
Do you have a pee? Even a pee would help.
Do you have a pee? Even a pee would help.
Go fish.

Blab. A reader who knows our new best friend Mike writes:
Now, now... don't pick on Mike. He was referring to your post from last year, not the recent one.
Mike takes about a year to notice when you link to him. Or maybe it takes him that long just to reply. Anyway, too bad you don't live on the West coast, you could've gotten an entertaining phone call from him instead of a boring form email.
Be still our beating heart.

Blab. A reader puzzles us. This is not unusual.
"I have a major in X (with a minor in Y)"
"I am the king of X (with a mansion in Y)"
An ad hoc Helenism?
What is an ad hoc Helenism?

Blab. A reader informs us of ...
Two wrong things:
1) Amazon.com sells beef jerky now.
2) They are also selling it used ("Condition: Acceptable").
It does strike us as a bit odd that anyone would order, from a Web site known for rapid delivery, a food item which is not capable of spoiling. Unless said food item is already used, of course, in which case you'd better get it before it rots entirely.
So, this makes sense to us.

Blab. A reader makes sure we keep up with cultural trends.
Holy Whopper! And the song is in the Swiss charts! - MS
DJ Utz? Our personal bagman! (Whatever that might mean.)

Blab. A helpful spammist writes.
Hello, My name is William,
I visited your web site and I was wondering if I could
help promote your site? [...]
Sure, Bill. Feel free.

Blab. A reader who still believes there is a "Canada" writes:
Eh! 'Tweren't us! -- A newly adopted Canadian
Don't know about you folks, but we're still suspicious. Deeply suspicious.

Plurp. That power outage? That biggest power outage ever? It looks like it didn't start in "Canada" after all. It was one of those glue states.
[Michehl R. Gent, head of the North American Electric Reliability Council, an energy oversight organization] said he was "fairly certain at this time that the disturbance started in Ohio."
He added, though, that the system should have prevented the cascading effect.
"It should have stopped, we think," Gent said. [...]
The three power lines that failed first were on a circuit known as the Lake Erie loop.
Gent said the loop of transmission lines has "been a problem for years, and there have been all sorts of plans to make this a more reliable thing, with cables under the lake and such, but nothing has come to fruition." [...]
The power outage has cost New York City over a half-billion dollars in lost revenue, according to preliminary estimates from the City Council. Chris Policano, a council spokesman, estimated losses of $500 million to $750 million in lost income; $35 million to $40 million in lost tax revenue; and $6.5 million in overtime costs to emergency crews and other city workers.
It turns out that the power companies have no incentive to update their aging transmission lines, as they are state-regulated monopolies with prices fixed by the state. So there's no way for them to benefit from investing in better transmission capabilities.
Once again, excellent economic thinking on the part of bureaucrats everywhere.

Yo. From slashdot (via friend Bill), an open source random number generator. No, we mean a real random number generator.

Plurp.
The blue dog
looks like salt, talks like salt, acts like salt,
seeks the vote and friendship of salt, yet,
when the test of taste comes, it is revealed
for what it really is -
a tasteless enabler of perdition!

Sunday, August 17, 2003
Plurp.

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